iloveamphora (12:30:03 AM): i hate being tickled but I'll like it for that kind of money
iloveamphora (12:30:09 AM): better than being pooped on

Catherine alerted me to the shit that is going down in Gaza. You should all go read about it and become properly enraged, etc.

But if like me you read about it and it makes you sick to your stomach and want to cry, here is something to cheer you up:

A Massive Failure for the Swedes">

This is my favorite picture of myself during college.

Today was okay.

I'm gonna eat some food and watch skins.

I am going to begin saving money for a camera.

A really really nice camera, that would allow me to adjust the focus and so on manually.

I've always loved taking pictures. Probably because I cannot draw, but also because looking around at the world makes me want to capture it in small fragments, something a photograph allows.

When Clay and I drove across the country, I took a lot of pictures with his new camera. Most of them were of the desert. We are desert children. Barren rock and hills are more beautiful to me than trees and grass. I like the emptiness where flowers cannot grow.

( Some pictures from the trip... )

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NESSA!!!!!!!!!!



Gratuitous crotch shot. That kind of gift don't need a bow on it.

I just went and looked at all my stuff piled in the garage. I stared at it a while. Stood and stared.

Then I came back and sat down here.

I am not making progress this way.

I want to sex my new laptop. It is hot. Also I have a bracelet that matches it. I am JUST THAT COOL. I had the bracelet first, btw. Cyberhobo ftw.

This song reminds of one afternoon I witnessed a man breaking it off with his wife, or woman in this coffee house called The Double Rainbow, in Albuquerque NM. I had just purchased the new CD that day and was listening to it en route..Then that happened, and I just remember the woman sitting in her chair, just sobbing...I went to my car and got the CD and gave it to her...Poor woman, I can still see her tear stained face thanking me.




AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHH WHAT THE HELL, MAN. AHAHHAHHAHHHA. Who breaks it off with his wife in a coffee house??????????????? WHAT THE HELL AT THIS STORY.

FAIL, New Mexico. Massive fail.

It looks like hell outside.

Driving home as the sun was setting was freaking weird.

The sky is lit up red, and so are the hills, and then further down the road it is black, black, black.

The sky was

There's so much ash in the air its hard to breath outside. FYI residents, Fairview is closed. I had to go to Los Carneros to get home.

The power was out but it has briefly come back on.

Gilad and Marie are coming over cause they have no power where they are. Gilad lives on the corner of the grid for the mandatory evacuation area.

Oh, they've been evacuated. They're here. Bye!

Lt. Crashdown is Darth Vader's apprentice in the new Star Wars game The Force Unleashed, coming September 2008.

I'm torn between staying awake and watching Razor or going to bed and going to section tomorrow morning.

I am afraid to go to section because I haven't gone to class and I'm afraid of being in a room with twelve people and having to answer questions. I don't want to go. I'm not going. See, I don't even know what the class is about. Remotely. I have not gone yet.

It's a miracle I'm still in school. I should have failed out ages ago. Why did I even come here? These things are mysteries.

I'm going to go to class tomorrow. I'm making progress on getting all my shit sorted out.

As long as I go to my class and do some research and make a resume/cover letter, I'll be doing pretty good.

I just ate way too many Milanos. I feel ill.

At work I kept using Customer Service Requests as scratch paper. Here are some thoughts on BSG I wrote down.

( spoiler alert for entire show )

I'm in a fucking pissy mood. Leave me nice comments so I feel better.

I told you I would post pictures later, and now is later.

I don't camera whore very often but when I do, it is an epic event.

Be prepared.

Also be prepared for my shitty blurry digicam photos, they are teh suck sometimes.


And this is not worksafe. Your coworkers don't want to see this. Neither do your children. Don't yell at me if they're in the room with you, I have no control over that. You've been warned, I did my part.

( Here be me )

A. a Christmas card
B. a Christmas card with a lewd picture inside it
C. a handdrawn picture of a natural disaster
D. a card, but for another holiday other than Christmas

Go!

So I showed up to work today. They were like "Why didn't you come to work yesterday?" Only not mad at me because they think I'm awesome. I was like "...my schedule didn't say to? Oh noes? What?" and then they're like "You're not scheduled for today" and I was like "...wut?" and then it turned out someone printed me out a schedule that went too far in advance and stuff has changed since then. So not my fault, and I get to come home and do laundry. Wooo, laundry.

Not really. But I have to do it because I am wearing brown pants I have had for six years and some green sweater that doesn't even fit me. I don't know where I got it. I certainly didn't buy it. I look like a retarded tree. I need new winter clothes. By that I mean shirts with long sleeves not made out of fishnet.

What else is going on? Not a lot. I tried to update the other day and then I erased it because I didn't feel like finishing it. This stuff isn't very interesting? I don't know, I don't have anything interesting to say.

I had a midterm this morning. (for example)

It was bollocks. I scheduled my time badly. Very badly. My long essay is like "Um, so black people weren't allowed into regular cinemas. So they had their own cinemas. And, um, they played jazz? At the cinemas? Griffith was a racist. So, uh, his films were racist. There was this guy, Micheaux, he made some films. And some money. Films and money. Is this done yet?"

For some reason, my 106 film isn't kicking my ass with work. And I'm tired anyways.

I like AC/DC. I don't care what you say.

Yeah, that midterm sucked. Whatever, I'm tired and undermotivated. Severely undermotivated. I showed up to school on Monday thinking my midterm was that morning. I thought it was the 6th. Turns out, not so much. Brittny's not there so I'm calling Brittny being like "WE HAVE A MIDTTERM OMG WHERE ARE YOU" like a dumbass. Then I go back inside and they're watching The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari.

I ask some guy "Is this film 101a?" and he's like "...yeah." and I ask "Don't we have a midterm?" and he answers "That's tomorrow." He actually didn't look at me like I was stupid, I don't know why. He was pleasant.

So I sit down on a packing crate (why is there a packing crate in the back of the cinema?) and dutifully watch the film. Eric comes up looming out of the darkness.

"Don't we have a midterm today?"
"Nope. That's tomorrow."

At least I am not the only one. Then he leaves and comes back in and is disruptive like usual. Like we're watching the movie and for once noone is rustling candy wrappers or texting all through it.

Five minutes in:

"What's your sign?"
"What?? Libra. Shhh!"
"It doesn't say anything about us sitting next to each other. That's probably a good thing."
"Shut up!"

It's like Buster Keaton all over again but I like Felando much less than I like Professor Chuck Wolfe. For one, his last name is Wolfe and his first name is Chuck. For two, he knows a lot about Buster Keaton. I like Buster Keaton.

Last night I watched one of his shorts from Columbia I hadn't watched yet even though I got the set last Christmas. All the films are rather sad. I mean, they're comedies but they're like "Oh how the mighty have fallen" sort of thing. Like, you'll recognize bits of routine from his other films and there's sound so you can hear him falling. And it's not funny.

I don't know exactly why, but it's not funny anymore with the thuds. The title, "Nothing but pleasure" is sad irony.

I was looking for silent film clips on youtube so I can post something about them but instead all I find are unfortunate looking people singing "Smile". WUT.

Never mind then. Have a photo:



Buster in the Passionate Plumber. I need to see that, even though I have heard the reports. fucking MGM and their fucking crap.

Sara, Im going to call you while I do laundry. You are missing some prime laughing-at-me business. I still have the big gooey girlcrush on that boy. I still don't know his name. I bet he's a freshman. I bet I'm a child pervert. AHH SHUT UP BRAIN.

Okay, I have to go.

So the Fourth of July was pretty fucking awesome.

We had a BBQ at our house, our friends all came, and we ate delicious foods.

After most people went home, Ali, Aharon and Abdallah hung about and we played keepie uppie. Then we all went on a backyard adventure. We explored the many trees in the yard and solved the Mystery of the Upturned Rubbish Bin. It was covering another upturned bin. That bin was full of dirt. I dug through it with a shovel to make sure there were no dead babies in the dirt. There were not. There were deadly spider in the bins however. Eventually those were slaughtered. With giant sticks.

Apparently gardens make me violent. I filled in some of the random holes in the garden so the snakes/gophers/monster couldn't get out. Next I killed some flowers by kicking their heads off. Ali suggested I get my sword, which seemed an excellent idea. The boys and I took turns decapitating the flowers and then we moved onto a version of baseball which had a sword for a bat and a lemon for a ball and instead of hitting the ball, the goal was to slice the lemon in half.

Aharon recorded it.



This video is ultimate Youtube tomfoolery. Maybe it will start a craze, like ghostriding or fenceplowing. I could be a celebrity AND a fool. A celebrity fool.

For the record, I had no idea he was filming. I thought at the end we were taking a picture. Also, that is not actually a prairie dress, it's a vintage house dress from the 1950's. I used to have an apron and stockings and heels on. Obviously I ditched them for better lemon-striking mobility.


Anyways, after lemonball we went to see LICENSE TO WED (I'm going to get a letter in the mail from the film department saying they've officially revoked my right to be a film major) but it was fun because of all the chill people. These people are legit, as the immortal and absent Aymen would say.

Post-movie we went to see the firework show. Laura, Brittny and Catherine went in Catherine's car; the three A's and I were in mine. I don't know what happened to them, but I do know that they sang songs. I found some place right in front of where they were letting them off, completely by luck, and then doubleparked and hopped out to catch the finale. Humans are so weird. They're like weird monkeys, lights and colors in the sky accompanied by loud noises entertain them. It's not even particularly that pretty, it's just loud and smoky and bright. Everyone clapped at the end, it's bizarre. Who are they clapping for? They're clapping for light and sound. They're clapping at the empty sky. Weird, weird monkeys.

Taaaaangent. Okay, we saw the fireworks. Then we were caught in insane traffic and so we did the reasonable thing to do, which was to play Robbie William's "Dickhead" way loud with the windows rolled down.

When we got home, Catherine taught us a cool card game called Bonjour Madame or something. And we played spoons. Ali's friend came over and we watched FLIGHT OF THE CONCHORDS. Hilarity. Friend bought sparklers so we went out back and played with fire. We ended up playing keepie uppie again until the wee hours of the morning. No, literally, it was about an hour. And past midnight, and right when the game spontaneously ended the asshole neighbors called the cops on us.

We went inside and ate icecreams and hung out a bit, and then people went home and people who were home went to bed.

( Picture Time! )

Also I found these post-it notes with quotes from Bradley, about Timothy. Very old, possibly redundant, here they are:

Me: Let's project 6 years from now...I'll have graduated, you'll have graduated college, Timothy will be in college...or jail.
Bradley: He'll be in rehab.

and

Me: (about Bradley's GPA) You're raising the bar for Timothy.
Bradley: He ate half a cake today.



Val out.